ThrivingTwogether

Hope Informs and Inspires Strategy

You've probably heard some form of "hope for the best and expect the worst." That sounds like a sure way to become schizophrenic.*

Others have taught something like,  "hope for the best and nothing bad will ever happen." This is akin to thinking a five-year old would make a good pilot.

Keeping a hopeful, faith-filled attitude doesn't eliminate the need to prepare. Rather it requires us to prepare for multiple outcomes.

Multiple outcomes?

• If your engine dies, name three ways you can you fix it for under $500?
• What if your A/C or furnace ceases to work? What could you do to fix it for free?
• Your roof is disrepair. How can you replace it for 60% the going rate?
• If you lost your main source of income today, how fast could you replace it with more income?
• Your tax refund is $5,000. What are two ways to spend invest it for your family's future?

Great lawyers, detectives, athletes, pilots, and parents know that praying and expecting the best is vital. But inherent in our hope is the imperative to plan for all outcomes, both good and bad.

(Photo courtesy freedigitalphotos.net)

*Original post from 2012 TT archives under different title)

No D?

Carlos Boozer was known as an outstanding offensive player. He was also known as a very weak defensive player.

During his career he played for the Cavs, Jazz and Lakers before retiring last year. 

His coach  often benched him during important times so he wouldn't allow opposing teams to score.

He usually missed the best part of games, the end of game.

With money, as in basketball, defense matters.

Offense:

Generally incomes rise with experience and education.

Thus you can expect to earn more as you acquire industry-specific knowledge and apply it to your profession.

Defense:

Outstanding financial stewards plug leaks, they play defense with intensity.

When spouses don't play defense, they often miss out on family time by virtue of divorce or overwork.

They know that financial death can happen from a thousand cuts or from ignorance or from deception.

Tight defense involves tracking expenses, numbering expenses, competing (with yourself) to reduce and prevent expenses and eliminating current expenses.

Don't be left out of the most important part of your family's life because of poor defense.

(Photo courtesy Pacoperez6) (Original blog form 2013 was entitled No Defense) 

T-Mobile Tuesdays

First find your passions. Melissa and I love food and travel. 

Second discover ways to get your passions for free or reduced prices.

Melissa and I followed that formula last Tuesday. 

We downloaded the T-Mobile Tuesday app on each of our phones.

Then we cashed in 3 free Dominoes pizza offers, 3 Vudu video offers and  got some free T-Mobile stock.

Total cost for three medium pizzas and a Zootopia video? Zero.

 The stock was free and hopefully will appreciate.

Frugality is living abundantly for little or no money.

What do you love to do/have/be? How can you get it for less?  

 

(Photo courtesy Mtaylor848)

 

Two Prong

Melissa and I ran into a long-time, younger friend a few days ago while grocery shopping.

He told us he is headed to Japan for a fifth time! He doesn't make much money, but he enjoys life.

We also know he is saving for his retirement (still several years away).

He is a two prong person, enjoying life and preparing for the future. 

Whenever we talk to him, we thrill to see how he enjoys life now while preparing for the future.

Are you more a one prong or two prong person? 

 

The Bosch Dishwasher (and the $100, 18 years of dishwashers)

Melissa and I calculated our total purchase price (minus rebates and selling used dishwashers)  for dishwashers in eighteen years of marriage.

It was $100.

Pretty cool.

By being frugal for eighteen years, we were able to buy a new Bosch dishwasher.

And it has every feature and warranty we could think of.

 

 

Forever Young?

My friend Harold died in 2013.  I have written about him a few times.

He passed away within 18 months of his cancer diagnosis.

I literally watched him lose over thirty pounds and shrink five inches in twelve months. 

He always asked me how I was doing and if there was anything he could do for me.

He worked hard and smart. And he never bragged about his career choice (physician). 

His life looked like this:

Survival->Success->Significance->Legacy

His hard work helped him retire early. Then he began to help people to a greater extent by donating several hours of his time each week.

When he died, many people wrote and spoke of his impact and legacy.

Harold did so much to help others, but he didn't prepare his wife for life without him.

His wife had never been involved much with finances. 

So when he passed away she felt helpless as she navigated a new world of money management.

Health problems ravish everyone at some point. And early death can happen to anyone. 

Are you preparing yourself and your spouse for a health crisis? Or maybe even an early death?

 

 

 

Dabble, Dabble, Deliberate, Decide, Do

A year ago Melissa and I learned about a Solar panel company.

We met with a few salespersons about getting some panels installed, read some reviews and then decided to wait a few months.

We eventually studied more about the company and even reviewed a few other companies.

Then we decided to accept their offer of a $1,000 end-of-year-sign-up bonus. 

Just a few weeks ago the panels were installed and we received our $1,000.

Nearly 365 days of dabbling, deliberation and finally a decision. 

Now it's done.

The alternatives?

Do and then deliberate. That's called buyer's remorse.

Dabble, Dabble, and dabble some more. That's called indecision. 

Never do. That's called dreaming. 

Bargains are found by dabbling, deliberating, deciding and doing. 

 

It is used

I recently had a very tough, almost depressing, budgeting session. 

A lady met with me to get a hold on her finances, but she seemed more interested in excuses than making and keeping money.

At one point I suggested a used car might be good for her since her housing is currently 100% of her budget, her income is low and she recently declared bankruptcy. 

Her reply? "It is used."

Her car is a 2013 model. And she pays about $350 per month. 

I explained that used (to me) means about 10 years old and with no loan--especially since she just declared bankruptcy a few months ago. 

She countered, "My bankruptcy lawyer told me it would be a good idea to buy the car to improve my credit."

This lady is not only broke, but she is mentally poor. She accepts unproven, false theories from the uninformed. 

I explained that she is the only one who can change her financial fate.

Will she?

I hope so. 

Our New Baby

Well we don't really have a new baby, but our new-to-us Toyota Sequoia is here!

And Melissa loves it. And I love it too, especially because we paid 1/4 of what it would cost new.

Over seven months ago Melissa and I began to discuss replacing our vehicle as we needed to replace our Honda Odyssey (227,000 miles and a slipping transmission).

We looked at Honda Pilots, Toyota Highlanders, GMC Yukons, and a few other larger  SUVs.

We checked Edmonds, Consumer Reports and we talked with several friends and relatives to discover what would be best for our family.

We realized certain SUV's weren't very roomy or lacked a comfortable third row. And we learned what years were poor for each brand.

We discovered core values for Melissa (roominess, heated seats) and core values for Ryan (fast, 4x4, sun-roof). 

Then when we bought it, we rejoiced in having made a united, allied decision.

Key Principles:

1. Take your time even when a problem seems urgent (slipping transmission anyone?)
2. Unitedly discuss decisions
3. Explore alternatives with a reckless abandon
4. Scientifically scrutinize your preliminary findings

 

(Photo courtesy Wikipedia-our Sequoia is a little older, but similar color and design)

 

 

 

Thoughts For Thriving Together

A friend fixed his wife's car. It took him eight hours, but prevented them from spending several hundred dollars at the repair shop. 

The best part is, he expressed his love by investing time into her concerns.

With that in mind, let me ask some questions to enhance and ignite your relationship.

 

Is this conversation crucial? 

Did I choose convenience or commitment when I get married?

Am I willing to work on myself to ensure a better relationship?

Do I need more money or more control of my money? 

Does my money tell me what to do or do I tell my money where to go?

Is my marriage like a microwave or a crockpot?

How many date nights should a thriving couple have?

What are my top priorities?

Are children more important than my spouse?

Who do I need to become to be trusted?

Do I regularly practice forgiveness?

Do I lack time? Or do I need to prioritize? 

 

 

Let Them Eat Cupcakes

A Florida father recently found himself unemployed. What did he do? He fell back on his cupcake business and his jump house business. Then he started two new businesses. His family worked with him to make all four businesses successful. But what would happen had he not had two part-time businesses already running when he lost his job? Their cupcake truck even sold out last weekend. After months of unemployment and much family work on multiple businesses, this large Florida family is beginning to thrive financially Of course, they laid the foundation before a job loss. Business building and family building are excellent foundations for prosperity. And preparation is best done BEFORE it's needed. (Photo courtesy Pamela)

"I hate it when rich people shop at [a thrift store]"

Two guys (let's call them Curly and Moe) complained about "stupid rich people" shopping at thrift stores. 

Another man I've known for a year  (let's call him Lincoln) interrupted them and suggested maybe the rich people were rich because they shopped for bargains at thrift stores.

Curly and Moe thought about that, but then decided rich people should buy retail.

Curly and Moe have no assets other than vehicles. No home, no savings. They make little and spend much (lunches, soda, vehicles, clothes, etc)

Lincoln has a net worth upwards of $200,000 and is very frugal. His household earns more than 3x the national average and yet he loves deals, bargains and people more than appearances.

Don't be like Curly and Moe. Think better. Be like Lincoln.

 

 

 

 

 

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Now that's thrifty

Like Columbus

Columbus persistently pioneered.

Do you? 

He lobbied rulers in Portugal, Italy, England and Spain for years before his offer was accepted by Spain.

Some say he was motivated by fame. Others claim he was money motivated. And others say it was God that guided him (Columbus journaled his feelings, testifying of Divine guidance).

Years ago I unkowingly emulated Columbus when I interviewed for my first post-college job. 

When one company didn't seem interested in my ability, I contacted their competition. 

The first company quickly offered me a well-paying job. 

Over the years I've found the joy of persistently pioneering: discovering new vistas by tenacity. 

And now when I want new basketball shoes, I look at Nike, U nder Armour and Adidas among others.

Or if I want a good deal on clothes, I check Amazon, eBay, a local mall and maybe even local classifieds.

If my children need/want to learn new skills?

We look at swimming, martial arts, dance, soccer, basketball, baseball, Parkour, Lego League or debate. 

Dogged. Determined. Variety-seeking. 

Like Columbus. 

 

 

23 Wealthy Words & Phrases

1 Wait

 

2 Timing

 

3 Many options, better choices 

 

4 Counsel (none of us is as smart as all of us)

 

5 Discuss with a spouse 

 

6 Live within your means 

 

7 Expand your means

 

8 Thrift 

 

9 Prudent

 

10 Earn more, spend less 

 

11 We can't afford it...yet

 

12 Is that the best you can do?

 

13 How can I earn more income and work less?

 

14 Frugal not cheap

 

15 High quality, low price

 

16 The best investment is family

 

17 Dream BIG

 

18 Work smart and hard

 

19 Negotiate

 

20 YOLO (and you live forever, so act accordingly) 

 

21 Give

 

22 Grace & Gratitude (you didn't do it alone)

 

23 Teach

 

 

 

Related articles

Wait, Google it and buy at a discount

A $50 iPhone

Recently I sold my iPhone 5.

I had bought it off eBay 18 months earlier for $250.

I sold it on KSL for $200.

Then I bought my new-used iPhone 5s for $260.

That comes to about $3-4 per month for an iPhone or $50 for 18 months.

The newest iPhones cost about $22-26 per month ($600-750 over 2 years). But many people don't know that because the cost is included in their monthly payment of $80-100 per line. 

 

 

 

 

 

To the rack

A lady whose income, combined with her husband's, is about $160,000 chooses to shop at Eddie Bauer because she likes the clothes.

But she refuses to pay retail. so what does she do?

She only shops the clearance rack. She heads straight to the rack to find $6 shirts and $10 pants.

Where would you shop if you made $160,000?

Would you pay retail or wholesale?

How much you make is important.

And what you keep is just as important.

High quality, low price is the way to go no matter your income.

If you're going to budget (and you should)

...then budget

-together

-do it quickly

-include income, not just outgo

-tell your money where to go (your priorities must trump your creditors' wants)

-Include fun money

-Invest/spend in and on what matters most (family, house, food, transportation)

Upgrading hardware, lowering usage cost

Melissa and I love to buck inflation.

We don't assume electricity, food, fuel, water, and clothing costs must rise with time.

We gladly pay one fixed, current cost to lower continuous, future costs.

One trick we employ to lower costs is to upgrade our appliances ( when they die) with energy efficient models.

Case in point: our 14 year old Maytag was new to us in 2008. We paid $200 and over seven years we washed close to 1,000 loads of laundry.

When it recently died (and the repair was too pricy and time consuming), we bought a very efficient newer washer.

Our LG uses 1/6 as much water as our old Maytag and will cut electricity consumption from 180 minutes to 150 per week.

Our LG is the highest rated manufacturer (for front-loader washers according to Consumer Reports) with nearly 50% more space for clothes, no agitator to hurt clothes and great looks.

Go for high quality, time-minimizing and lower ongoing costs in your hardware purchases and you will create freedom due to your frugal choices.

A broken Bosch

How much would you pay to fix a Bosch dishwasher?

A good friend of mine was quoted $250 for a repair.

He decided to Google the solution and found out he could fix it for $2.50.

He did.

High quality. Low price. That's frugal and that creates freedom from debt.

Glasses Won't Help

Getting to the root of a problem can be tough. Often we think the "leaves" are the problem, when in fact the root is malnourished.

Case in point. Over several months my eyes occasionally became blurry as I looked at my computer.

My solution? Dim my lighting. That didn't help. Then I thought my computer's resolution should be adjusted. That too didn't fix my problem.

Finally I met with an Opthomologist. He triple checked my eyes.

His conclusion?

My eyes were blurry because I didn't blink often enough.

Wow!

What I learned:

-experts' thoughts are not my thoughts

-simple is better

-ask

Are you focusing on 'roots' or 'leaves' when you face a problem?

The 16 year-old boss

My daughter, Anastasia, is amazing! She takes summer classes for fun, helps others through hardships and loves to learn about business.

Last week she attended business week in Northern Utah and was voted CEO by her peers. She paid for half the cost and we covered the rest.

Many will say children are liabilities. She's not. The love, time and money we've given her has come back with massive returns.

An asset pays dividends. A liability drains resources.

Children should be one of your top assets.

The money you spend on them should be an investment not an enablement.

Give them resources to help them grow and become self-reliant not to facilitate weakness and dependence.

Wait, Google it and buy at a discount

$120,000 for a timeshare or $1,800 for a smoke alarm? Those were two money questions I heard this last week.

A couple told me about spending over $100,000 ensure they vacation every year.

That's a ginormous price to pay to guarantee vacations happen.

Vacations are fun IF you pay BEFORE you vacation. Never finance vacations.

Another couple was looking at a very pricey fire alarm. The salesman wanted over $1800 for his "life-saving"unit.

With a quick Google search, I found a similar unit for $75.

Lessons?

Pay as you go.

Search.

Buy at a LARGE discount.

Wait.

Tinkering

Invented 101 years ago, Tinker toys epitomize creative building and innovation.

Tinkerers adapt. Create. Accept multiple truths.

When's the last time you tinkered with your marriage? Your income? Expenses? Spirituality? Health?

Tinkerers tinker before something breaks. In fact, tinkerers improve and often creatively destroy the status quo.

Now that's thrifty

I talked to a lady today from Arizona who decided she wanted an entire brand-new wardrobe.

So she took all of her clothes from her closet down to the thrift store. She then used a thrift store credit to get all new (used) clothes.

Perhaps the best part is because she lives in a very prestigious area, her new (used) clothes were gorgeous. Some clothes even had tags still on them.

Now that is thrifty and soon she's going to be free!

Newly married and old-school wise

A young newlywed couple taught me the value of being thrifty.

I talked with them in Florida and found out they had the exact same type of rental car I did.

Whereas I paid $22 a day for my rental car, they paid $13 at Fox Car Rental.

I had compared prices with Hertz, $35 a day, and felt good with my $22 a day Firefly decision.

I should've checked three companies instead of two.

He's famous and he won a car

Last night my wife and I met Dave. And he helped us meet two well known radio personalities in Utah, Todd and Erin.

Dave is from Salt Lake City and he decided to work at winning radio contests.

In the last twelve months he's won two iPads and a new Subaru. And concert tickets. And food.

The cost? He spends several hours each week studying contests and of course he constantly listens to the radio.

He's discovered that hard work, planning and dreaming produce abundance.

Sure luck is involved, but Dave knows that luck is tied to work, planning and dreaming big.

The Asker

Yesterday I blogged about seekers. Today I'll let you know about the Asker.

Melissa constantly teaches me about the power of asking. She is the most curious person I've ever met. She's a perpetual rookie in her humility. And because of her humility she has become very smart.

Last week she called Amazon to ask for $30 of our recent shipping charges to go towards a Prime membership. She asked and the Amazon customer service agent laughingly told her no.

Then Amazon sent a customer survey about her experience. She told them that she wasn't happy with the answer.

Amazon then gave her a $30 gift card!

Melissa asked. Amazon delivered $30!

$600 for a windshield?

Last week shortly before I went out of town on a business trip I had one of those days. One of those days where something unexpected happens threatening to ruin your budget by a few hundred bucks.

I had noticed a couple cracks in my windshield and wanted to get it replaced. Unfortunately because I was heading out of town I had to wait a few days to get it fixed.

The windshield installer told me I would need to get body work done on the top of my car for the windshield to be properly installed. I told him I didn't want to spend a few hundred dollars on the body repairs and to try to replace the windshield without the repairs.

It worked. I didn't have to spend a few hundred dollars to fix some minor body damage . And my comprehensive deductible was zero so my windshield was no cost as well.

Essentially I paid nothing for a potential $600 repair ($209 windshield and $400-700 body work).

Look up

On a business trip to Chicago I felt completely lost. The gigantic McCormick Convention Center was packed with 1,200 businesses clamoring for new customers. And I was trying to find new customers as I navigated the Convention Center for the first time. My method was intuitive, walk and adjust as I gained information.

Then a colleague taught me what it means to find your way by looking up, reading signs and THEN moving.

He carefully looked up to read sign after sign for businesses, food vendors and parking. And we easily found our way.

I moved BEFORE studying. He moved AFTER carefully and slowly studying.

He looked up. I looked around.

Perhaps today is a good day for you to look up, slow down and read the instructions before acting.

The Only Way? One Way?

I was talking to one of my wise brothers-in-law a few days ago.

He explained a pretty cool concept to me. We often think that there's only one way to get through life, our way. We know the perfect job, the only perfect spouse or the perfect house.

Everything is gonna work out the way that we planned.

Eventually though, if we allow it, life shows us that there's a better way. The better way is choosing wisely and then making our choice work. It's a plan that evolves as we commit to a way.

We notice many suitable jobs, houses or potential spouses but we need to pick one and make it work. Not the perfect choice but one choice that we make terrific.

Several people have asked me lately if they have found the one, right spouse.

A better question is, "how can I make this marriage thrive?"

We're not looking for a perfect situation before acting.

Rather we choose and then make our choice shine.

Boy Scouts and forgotten ear protection

After target shooting guns for several hours a few Boy Scouts and their leaders camped for the night. Around 11pm nearby campers cranked loud music causing the Boy Scouts and leaders to murmur about the crazy rockers.

Then, one intelligent leader, quietly slipped out of his tent and put on his ear protectors. His top-of-the-line ear protectors, used earlier to keep out gun noise, kept out the music during the night.

The next morning most of the leaders and Scouts complained about the loud music and lack of sleep.

But one leader chuckled and explained his solution.

When life offers loud music and poor sleep, we can yell at the rockers, murmur or put on ear protection.

Change what is easy and controllable, not other people's behaviors.

Prepare Bamboo, forget even keel

Recently a prominent athlete said his team must remain even keel to win the Championship.

Even keel is when an aircraft or watercraft proceed smoothly, no bumps no turbulence.

Stable is a nice condition, but it rarely exists.

In money, marriage and life even keel is nearly non-existent. Turbulence and waves constantly interfere with our plans.

The solution? Be like Bamboo.

Fresh Bamboo moves with wind,rain and force. It's strength stems from flexibility.

Bamboo doesn't rely on perfect conditions. It adjusts. It accommodates. It thrives.

Going Pro

Several years ago I overpaid for professional services.

I paid $60 for tax services from a franchised tax company. My taxes were done fast and with little effort to maximize deductions.

That's when I realized that it's possible to overpay for professional services. Some "professionals" charge like pros and work like amateurs.

(Of course you can also spend too much of your TIME on do it yourself projects.)

But do not spend too much money on professional services if the professional is an amateur- or worse, a novice.

Shades

This week's example of over spending comes in the form of a contrast.

I once bought used Oakley sunglasses for $35. I kept them two years before I sold them for $20. I easily afforded the modest purchase.

Last week a person paid $130 (retail, of course) for Under Armour shades. His household income is 10% below the national average and his consumption of luxury sunglasses is 700% higher than what it should be.

Lessons? Live within your means while expanding your means. Pay as you go. Be modest in expenses.

If you buy a $130 luxury good, but it used at 60-80% of retail. And make sure your income justifies such a purchase.

Blessings without feet

Blessings don't come with feet. That's what I learned at Church this last week. (At least I think that's what was said. The service was in Spanish. Maybe he really said, "After the blessing, let's eat!")

I remember helping my dad repair apartments in Lyons, NY. The tenants survived on food stamps and welfare checks despite being able to work.

They had cable TV and food but they didn't know the blessings that come from work. That was frustrating to me because our family didn't have cable TV and we often had little food, but my parents worked 100 hours a week between jobs and college.

Sure the welfare family had some basic commodities to sustain life but they didn't have success. Success comes from work and self-reliance.

They definitely didn't have a feeling of significance. That comes from taking care of others.

Blessings don't come with feet. But people do.

It's time to rise up.

When Fuji and Darwin met in Rochester

In the mid 1980's Fuji Film sent a team of individuals to observe what was going on in Rochester, New York.

They spent several days at Kodak  finding out what Kodak was doing to develop the digital film market.

The visit was reminiscent of Apple going to Xerox park in the early 1980's to copy Xerox's mouse and GUI. Fuji wanted to see how Kodak developed digital film. Fuji learned and APPLIED what they learned.

Kodak taught but failed to DO. They didn't pursue digital film aggressively for another 20 years. 

Fuji is now the dominant player in digital photography. And Kodak?  Kodak is nearly extinct.

Kodak forgot Darwin. Evolve or die. 

Families do the same thing as Kodak sometimes. They forget to evolve. They cling to past traditions, forgetting growth comes by being willing to change for the better.

Don't cling to the past simply because it's tradition.

Be open to progress, to change!

 

Wish upon a star

Yesterday a colleague told me, "I wish I was like you."

"What do you mean?"I said.

"Well, you seem so disciplined. You always are eating just the right foods. Isn't that expensive?"

"No. My wife and I spend about $500-600 a month on groceries for a family of six."

"But doesn't all that food go to waste? How do you eat it all before it goes bad?"

I explained to him that it's not expensive to eat well; that it doesn't take more time to be disciplined.

Finally I said, "Your daily decisions determine destiny."

Choose high returns for your activities. Don't pack more doing but rather more effective activities into your day.

Disciplined people use commute time to learn not just to listen to music.

Disciplined people use their time to listen to excellent books or podcasts not romance novels.

Disciplined people make time to exercise on the lunch break or before work or after work or while they watch TV.

To my valentine

With Valentine's Day just around the corner I couldn't help but think about my special Valentine.

Melissa and I have been married nearly 17 years and I've learned a ton from her about how to be frugal and wise with finances as well as numerous other lessons.

She's taught me how to make extra money too.

A little over four years ago she wisely suggested that we volunteer to help at a local elections. We did and earned over $500 in addition to my regular income.

We used a portion of that $500 to buy a Nintendo Wii and about eight games to go with it. Our family has been blessed for a number of years with some fun games that were paid for in cash because my wife's wise idea.

This Valentine's Day I pay tribute to my frugal, beautiful wife who helps me live a life of freedom.

Not a Willie

When it comes to taxes don't pull a Willie Nelson who owed $32,000,000 to the IRS because he failed to inspect his accountants.

Pay your taxes. But choose an honest, competent tax specialist after talking with a few. Don't choose cheap for one of your biggest expenses. Choose competent.

And don't just do it yourself; make sure you do a hybrid approach: researching manuals on taxes for hours and using a CPA or other competent professional to find legitimate ways to decrease your tax liability. A true professional will often save you hundreds or thousands while costing very little.

Make sure they truly understand the tax laws and the proper deductions.

Meet with an accountant regularly so they can review your ideas and ensure you're being honest without overpaying.

Free budget review

I've talked to a few people lately who are in troubled marriages and who have money troubles.

I asked them to send me a recent budget with income and outgo. It has been very rewarding to see them happy again as they discover "fixed expenses" are fluid. They have saved a few hundred dollars a month while finding joy in rich relationships.

So if you'd like a FREE budget review, send me your simple budget to [email protected]. All information is confidential.

Loch Ness Monster

Some frugal pundits should be classified as fiction authors. Perhaps their books could be sold right next to the Loch Ness Monster books.

A few days ago I read several myths put forth by an alleged frugal person. He is a single tight-wad, not a happily married, frugal guru with an abundant life-style.

A car should NOT be bought based exclusively or even primarily on gas mileage. A reliable, quality, safe car is vital. Gas mileage is also important, but not vital. Car repairs and death are more expenisive than gas mileage.

Living with in-laws may save money short-term but it just may cause serious marital conflict as interfering parents OFTEN offer unsolicited advice.

Taxes are not to be overlooked since it will invaiably be your top 1 or 2 expenses.

Turning off lights in your house can save you maybe $100 a year. Decreasing TV watching may save you more money. But if your're gonna turn off TV and lights, you might want to read a story about Scrooge and how he lived in a dark, cold house with no TV. Sound familar? Turn on the lights, watch a little TV and enjoy life while living better for less... not cutting out life. Life is about abundant experiences with loved-ones. More joy for less...not simply less for less.

Tightwad misers might be thrifty, but usually they are simply cheap. But frugality is about quality, joy, others.

Your money is your god when your're a tightwad.

Saving money by DIY shavecream? Your time and a happy shaved spouse is a money invested not blown.

A budget is simply YOUR plan to invest money by allocating it to memorable experiences andlife-enhancing products.

Don't simply 'not-spend'. Allocate your money to your dreams. Don't discount your dreams and life-style.

Dream bigger, live better for less.

A car should not be bought based exclusively or even primarily on gas mileage. A reliable, quality, safe car is vital. Gas mileage is also important, but not vital. Car repairs and death are more expenisive than gas mileage.

Living with in-laws may save money short-term but it just may cause serious marital conflict as interfering parents OFTEN offer unsolicited advice.

Taxes are not to be overlooked since it will invaiably be your top 1 or 2 expenses.

Turning off lights in your house can save you maybe $100 a year. Decreasing TV watching may save you more money. But if your're gonna turn off TV and lights, you might want to read a story about Scrooge and how he lived in a dark, cold house with no TV. Sound familar? Turn on the lights, watch a little TV and enjoy life while living better for less... not cutting out life. Life is about abundant experiences with loved-ones. More joy for less...not simply less for less.

Tightwad misers might be thrifty, but usually they are simply cheap. But frugality is about quality, joy, others.
Your money is your god when your're a tightwad.

Saving money by DIY shavecream? Your time and a happy shaved husband is a money invested not blown.

Invest money through by allocating it to memorable experiences, life-enhancing products and etc.

Don't simply not-spend. Allocate your money to your dreams. Don't discount your dreams and life-style. Dream bigger, live better for less.

LeRoy Road dream home

I recently visited with my two best childhood friends, Gene and Tim, on a visit to Palmyra, New York.

Tim and I reminisced about my childhood home. It was built in 1974, the final year of The Brady Bunch.

My parents had it built after buying an investment property. And they built it after planning and buying sufficient land.

They planned my childhood home, bought the land and then built a 2,000 square foot home with a 1,000 foot garage (huge for when it was built in the 1970's).

In the basement we had a used, free pool table. We had a dartboard and two bedrooms that my dad built. Also we had a large storage area for food and water.

In the family room we had built-in book shelfs lined with encyclopedias and several other books. We also had free standing bookshelves with perhaps 300 non-fiction books. That's where I fell in love with business books, religious books and self-help books.

In the third of four levels we had one of two fireplaces and a large kitchen and living room. There in the kitchen my mom was known to secretly "stretch" our milk by adding water.

And in the upstairs section we had three more bedrooms including my room.

The total cost of that house? $30,000.

Throughout the years we added a pool and a paved driveway and many trees. My parents sold it for over $80,000 about 17 years after they had it built. Now it's worth $139,000.

The helpless

The ones who can't help you are the best to help you.

Recently I began looking for salespersons to help grow frugal2free. As I called employment agencies I quickly found out they couldn't help me with my unusual request (no upfront fees and merit-based pay).

But each of the the persons I talked with gave me valuable advice to get closer to my goal. They told me where to post, what other companies to call and what time of the year is best for hiring. They told my about unemployment rates and confirmed some of my assumptions.

Another time a mechanic couldn't replace my muffler but he referred me to a garage that could.

It all served as a reminder that everyone can help. Even those who seem helpless.

Scrimping

In order to buy a business in 2006 I sold my Toyota Corolla. It was only worth a few thousand dollars, but it helped in the very rough first months.

I scrimped to build an asset. Other times my family has scrimped to save for a dream vacation.

When the business became an asset, I bought my dream car (Lexus LS400) as a reward for my earlier discipline.

I advocate scrimping only for short spurts. Life is too short to scrimp for years.

And make sure to reward yourself for scrimping.

The Melissa Factor

In 1997 I began to date the lady who would become my wife. Even back then I knew she filled in my gaps. She was a musically inclined, empathetic, listening, prodigy who utterly intimidated me.

A few days ago when I broke my iPhone I called her to see what ideas she had.

She Googled the solution. Next she called a few repair stores to comparison price. Then she searched Amazon and eBay for the best deal on parts.

Total fix? $45. Sure beats $100 at a local repair shop. And it beats buying a new $600 phone or the 2 year contract option of even the used, replacement phone option.

What I learned: Marry up. Ask spouse for help. Listen. Don't panic when something initially looks bad. Hold unto the one you chose.*

(If the decision was right at first, then hold unto it forever. That goes for marriage, family, love, faith, and any other good thing)

It takes work (or drug-dealing)

"That's' not a lot." A man told me cutting expenses by $180 is not enough to go through 5 mintutes of work. "It's a hassle."

I told him, "Let me know if you find another way, other than drug-dealing, to create that much money in 5 minutes of work."

He's right about one point: cutting expenses takes work.

Discussing and projecting future expenses takes work.

Creating a spending and savings allocation takes work.

Thinking of your spouse more than self takes work.

Looking for high-quality, durable, enjoyable experiences, products and services takes work.

Sticking with marriage, children and faith takes work.

It's your choice.

Will you choose work or hassle-free mediocrity?

Twice a year

Can you imagine living so close to work that you only need to fill your commuter-car up with fuel twice a year?

Or can you imagine needing to only fill up your family SUV or mini-van twelve times a year?

A frugal friend told me that those are his family habits. They have two cars, enjoy technology and some fun hobbies, but spend very little on fuel.

He didn't become austere. He became thrifty. Notice he didn't sell his cars and walk everywhere.

Rather he practiced thrift, not excessive elimination of modern conveniences.

Becoming a neophyte

Neophytes are problem solvers. They have challenges like anyone else but they overcome challenges very quickly.

Why?

Neophytes believe in timing. God's timing, not their own. Neophytes work while they wait.

Neophytes trust in multiple solutions. They know that linear, narrow-minded thinking is ineffective.

Neophytes are focused on the new and the true. They are learners.

If no wind...

then row.

When circumstances are contrary we can moan. We can complain. We can quit.

Or? We can act.

If circumstances are unfavorable or non-existent we should choose to act.

One of my heroes attended college and dated often while she was a broke, divorced mother of two. She chose to row instead of remaining complacent.

No wind? Then row.

Early and often

I hate weeds. Especially Morning Glory.

Morning Glory likes to infiltrate my yard everyday from May until September.

Each morning my sons pick and thrive away a handful of Morning Glory weeds.

Over the last few years we discovered daily, early weeding is better than weekly or monthly weeding binges.

Early and often.

Same goes for savings. Ditto for debt reduction.

Early and often are hallmarks of discipline and prosperity.

(Photo courtesy Wikipedia)