Respect. That's what we crave and what a spouse needs.
Mutual respect is the ideal.
And mutual respect can start with one person giving unmerited respect.
Submitting is often a component of respect.
Listening is also vital to respect.
How do you get respect?
Give it.
Give it especially when you don't feel like it and when you think your spouse doesn't deserve it.
(Photo courtesy Wikipedia)
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